Parenting Tips with Melanie Wilson

Melanie Wilson is vegan mom to Kalli MacKenzie. She is the owner and editor of Vegetarian Baby and Child Magazine (www.vegetarianbaby.com), a writer, educator, and researcher. She is currently working on her first book on vegetarian parenting. Her articles have been published on iParenting.com, MomsOnline.com, and will soon appear at VegDining.com. She is also an accredited La Leche League Leader.

Question:

My little sister is ten and I really want her to see that it is wrong to eat meat. I want her to understand where I'm coming from when I tell her that the animals have feelings too. How can I lead her in the right direction?

Answer:

You sound like such a wonderful and loving big sister or brother! Sometimes when we learn the benefits of a vegan diet and feel so strongly about the horrors of animal abuse, we feel we must share this information and convince everyone to see the light! The truth is, some people want to hear it...and some don't. Do you remember how it makes you feel when someone in a position of authority--your parents or teachers or whoever--is trying to force you to see things their way? When they refuse to listen to your point of view or just keep on nagging when you've heard enough? Unfortunately, this is how some people feel when we talk about veganism. They just don't want to hear it because they don't agree, or they would rather not know so that they continue doing what they're doing. After all, making changes in life can be hard!

Your best bet is to lead by example, and it doesn't sound like you'll have any trouble with that at all. Just the fact that you want to lead your sister "in the right direction" is evidence that you have the guiding spirit, that you have compassion and care about others. I'd be willing to bet that that caring and compassion for others (and for animals!) comes through in all that you do. Your sister cannot help but notice when you make different food choices than she does. Sometimes we notice things and think about them for a long time before we find the motivation to act. If you just continue to follow your heart and live what you believe--without trying too hard to push your ideas on anyone unless they ask you for information--you will set a wonderful vegan example for your sister to follow. Ultimately, it has to be her decision, and the best thing you can do is to be there to provide a role model and answer her questions without judging.

Ten-year-olds are very curious, and she will no doubt ask you about why you live the way you do. Keep in mind that she is weighing everything you tell her with what she's learned in school and from others. Some of that information is very misguided, but she doesn't know that. It may take time for her to determine for herself what feels right in her heart. Many adults even find it hard to truly believe all the facts about veganism. I commend you for your open-mindedness and your willingness to take a different path in life. Always follow your heart!

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